Falling apart, holding it all together. Then falling apart,
then holding it all together again. Cycles of integration and disintegration.
Chaos and ground. Stillness and activity. Sanity and confusion. Hopelessness
and hope. As flows the natural world, the unfolding of the heart is alive and
of the unknown.
In ways the mind may never resolve, guidance is pouring
through you, washing away that which is less than whole, preparing you for what
is next. But what is next is always of the nameless and will never be
approached ahead of time by means of the conceptual. Stay close in the liminal,
and attune to the creativity as it emerges out of the here and now.
While the narrative that you are “falling apart” is rich
and multi-layered, look carefully and see if you were ever “together” to begin
with. You are the vast space in which “together” and “apart” dance in union,
and you will never be limited to either of these narratives. Rest for a moment
and honor the unprecedented nature of what is moving within you.
If you remain too identified with “falling apart,” you cut
into the natural aliveness that is the essence of pure, immediate experience.
You lose contact with the luminous within, and become misattuned to the wisdom
of your unfolding experience, exactly as it is. You disconnect with the
radiance of embodied presence, with the intelligence of the earth, and with the
high-voltage realization that nothing has ever been wrong with you. You forget
that the darkness, when provided sanctuary, is brighter than a thousand suns.
But if you remain too identified with “holding it all
together,” you disconnect from your natural vulnerability and the spontaneous
mystery as it appears, turning from the surging reality that your heart could
break at any moment. It is true that raw, tender sadness or deflation could
approach at any time, requesting safe passage inside you. But it is through
this broken aliveness that the poetry of your life will flow.
Right in the middle of “falling apart” and “holding it
together” is the secret essence. Stay there. It is here where the light and the
dark are in union, where integration and disintegration emerge as one in love,
and where lunar and solar are weaving the substance of the sacred world.
Artist unknown
The Way of Rest summer retreat – registration open now
New book – The Path is Everywhere: Uncovering the Jewels Hidden Within You – to be released in April
