Tuesday, December 12, 2023

The capacity to grieve


One thing I’ve discovered in my own life (pain) – and also in my clinical work – is that it’s the capacity to grieve that creates the linkages in psyche and soma that are at the very essence of neural integration.

There is no true rebirth without passing through the portal of grief, which is not a solar journey upward into transcendence, but attunement to the descending current, into earth, body, and mud.

It is what allows us to hold and metabolize the fragments of the unlived life, held deep in the soul and the somatic unconscious.

One of the hallmarks of unresolved relational trauma is the incapacity to mourn, to weep all the way down into our cells, and make the journey of embodied lamentation.

As relational beings wired to co-regulate and co-enter the Mystery together, we’re not always able to do this on our own.

We long for a Friend to bear witness to the subtle depth of our tears, emanations of the alchemical salt, which wash and purify the way ahead.

The nature of the Ally is that of a shapeshifter and will appear in a variety of forms, and may surprise us.

As our perception is cleansed and our heart is polished, its form will become more clear, more vivid, and translucent.