Monday, October 20, 2014
The sweet and fierce transmission of Homesickness
At times, a certain sort of homesickness may fill your heart and color your world; a longing to return home, back to some place within that you may have forgotten, where you can finally rest in the vastness that you are.
Before you abandon this homesickness and cut into its fierce and sweet transmission, please open your heart to it, for it is none other than the activity of the beloved one, unfolding and illuminating inside you.
Just under the homesickness itself, which is of a certain purity, you may discover that there are some very alive feelings that you just do not want to feel, that in fact you have spent your entire life organized around never feeling. Might you be willing to touch and hold these ones before concluding that they are somehow an error? Perhaps the experience of homesickness is not one that needs to be subjected to any sort of psychological or spiritual process, as if it's some sort of mistake that you need to make go away.
Let us discover, finally, in a really embodied way, if homesickness is a problem that must be corrected, an error to be fixed, or evidence that you have somehow failed or are fundamentally flawed. In the center of the experience of homesickness, right in its very core, the beloved is resting and her body is open to you, offering her invitation to please not convert your precious, embodied experience into something else, i.e. something more "spiritual."
Whether homesickness is arising in your present experience or the experience of "being home," the beloved appears to have no bias; for each are equal arrows in her quiver, unique fragrances brought here by she and her envoys to awaken one of the qualities of love within you.
Please don't abandon your homesickness or orphan it out in the cold, for it, like all experience when met with loving awareness, is pure grace; not pathology, but pure path; a direct golden illuminated portal into the heart.