Wednesday, June 22, 2016
A prayer of wholeness
As an open, sensitive human being, there will be times when heartbreak will visit – coloring your perception, soaking your emotions, and painting the sensations of the somatic world. As you wake in the morning, look up into the moon, and fall asleep at night… it’s just there waiting for you. This vague sense that something is missing. Of disappointment in the way things are unfolding.
Before you send the heartbreak away – before you process it, dissolve it into space, convert it to joy, and spin away from it in shame and blame – turn toward it and see. Go slow. Breathe into it. Provide safe passage for the heartbroken one that has been looking for you for so long.
Perhaps at a much earlier time, with a star or a tree or the water as your witness, you made a prayer of wholeness. The response to that prayer has come, but not in the way you expected. It has arrived by way of the shattering of an old dream, the dream of how you thought it would all turn out. While this dream is painful, it is alive, sacred, and holy.
No, heartbreak and disappointment are not easy. As two of the fierce emanations of integration, they will throw you off at times. They will pull the rug out from under you and remind you of how open it really is here, of how anything could happen, and of how unresolvable the activity of love truly is.
As you make experiential, embodied, intimate contact with the tender one within, you can finally meet her. You can hold him.
There is nothing wrong with you. These ancient feelings and emotions are not enemies working against you. They are not evidence of your failure, or that you have fallen from the path. They are the path. But they are not the path you thought. They are of the unknown and seeded with creativity.
They are relentless in a way, the forms of love, but will never give up, they will never stop looking for you and calling you home.