Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Dissolved in the crucible of rewiring tenderness

At times, the only home you can find is one crafted of light particles of pure homelessness. No matter how much you thought you knew about love, about yourself, about why you have come here, and about how it was all going to turn out, these reference points are ground to dust in the radiant here and now. Dissolved into the crucible of rewiring tenderness.

Though this home is not a solid one, laden with promises, dreams, and future oriented around ‘me’ and my ‘needs,’ it is an environment of love from which you will move to connect with beings everywhere. Out of this home you will wander and seed your heart and your essence out into a precious, weary world.

The only ground left is that of a vulnerable, yet raging alive groundlessness. Anything could happen and nothing will ever be the same – that much is clear. You are utterly exposed, blown open, yet excruciatingly present to what is happening. It is so clear now that things will never turn out the way you thought they would. You are being asked to allow the old dream of 'me' to die, over and over and over again, with no idea, yet, of what will be reborn out of the ashes of integration.

It feels as if you are falling apart, yes, but even that idea dissolves into empty space as you realize you were never 'together' to begin with.

No matter how it may appear, love is always holding you. But this holding will never be understood by the mind or apprehended through the known. It will never conform to your hopes and fears as it is an emissary of pure, transmuting creativity. It is the portal into a new world.