Saturday, February 21, 2015
Untangling the wounds of the heart
It can be astonishingly liberating to discover that the very intense display of emotion, feeling, and sensation need not be understood, transformed, or even 'healed' by psychological and spiritual process. But is arising, now, to finally be met, held, digested, and integrated into the vastness that we are. Your sensitivity need not be healed. Your vulnerability need not be corrected.
As we descend under the very vivid storyline of me and other, of what is missing, of who is to blame, of how we have 'failed' and are unworthy of raging, creative love – and into the wild, unprecedented territory of the somatic world – what is awaiting us there is freedom, in the very place we least expected it. Right in the very core of our feelings of abandonment, rejection, anger, and shame – hidden in the very essence of our sadness, loneliness, anxiety, and longing – pure sanctuary. We need not remove any arising form from what we are or engage in imaginary wars with them by use of spiritual concepts, but create a home for them to unfold and reveal their nature as open awareness itself.
As we can slowly begin to allow, tolerate, and even say 'yes' to the reactive emotions, disturbing feelings, and burning sensations which arose in response to empathic failure in our early environments, we can retrain ourselves to stay embodied to what is actually alive in the moment, thereby creating new neural grooves in our brain and nervous system. With the beloved in whatever radical form she chooses to appear in, together we can rewrite the narrative of 'me.'
As we gradually start to contain, breathe into, and infuse awareness inside the display, it will reveal itself to have been an ally on the path all along – not an obstacle but a long-lost companion. At times a fierce and wrathful companion, yes, but a true heart-guide nonetheless. It is then that we can then begin to practice kindness towards these messengers – to open our hearts to them and to oxygenate them with our loving presence. This is what is required to untangle the wounds of the heart.
Photo of the Heart Sea Arch in Portugal – photographer unknown