Friday, November 2, 2012

Sleeping and dreaming - and the secret chamber of the center of being...



There is something about those moments just before the sun rises when, if we allow ourselves, where we might fall so naturally into a secret chamber within the center of our being. There, a luminous door is revealed into an utterly naked and exposed vulnerability, where we’ve not yet pieced together this life and its worries, where we can’t quite tell if we’re awake, asleep, dreaming, who we are, or how our hearts could possibly open all the way to one more day. We’ve not yet remembered if we’re “awakened,” if we “have a self,” if “the personality is gone,” if we have great stories to tell about ourselves and our amazing spiritual accomplishments and “states.” How will we ever respond to such an invitation? Where will we send our energy? Who will we be without our special spiritual stories, without our fantasies of the earth-shattering “shift” that has taken place and “having no self” (that we can’t wait to tell everyone about)? Will anyone see us? Who are we before the dreams about me and my specialness fill the day? 

How will we allow the radical power of kindness and compassion to take form through our bodies, through our words, through our care for another? Will we meet the other as they are in this day, setting aside our fantasy ideas about how we will “awaken” them with our presence, saving humanity as one of the special ones who have come to usher in some new age? Are we awake yet – or are we still dreaming? Somehow we can’t tell – the veil is too thick. Yet in the very next moment, through some grace from beyond, the compelling stories somehow fall away; the special “me” just isn’t quite as interesting as it was only a moment ago, and true, genuine care and kindness pours through. It’s just us after all – wide open, vulnerable, wondering what the unknown mysteries of love might have in store for us today – humbled, filled with gratitude for this life as it is, knowing that this love cares not for our stories of awakening. In what ways we will allow ourselves to be broken open in love? In what ways will we touch the heart of another? In what ways will we allow all of our dreams of awakening to melt into the unbearably alive reality of the actuality of love and its movement?

In the words of our friend and guide, Jalal al-Din Rumi: "Today, like every other day, we wake up empty and frightened. Don't open the door to the study and begin reading. Take down a musical instrument. Let the beauty we love be what we do. There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground." Let us give everything we have to find our unique way to kneel and kiss the ground on this day – and to be that humble, gratitude-filled, transparent vessel for love to pour through, reassembling this world, particle by particle, with that same grace that made this body, designed this heart, and was the architect of this outrageously gorgeous Universe. 


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