Tuesday, July 24, 2012

A grace-doorway into the end of our world

It is very likely that every single day for the rest of our lives we will experience, in one way or another, the raging fires of our core vulnerabilities. What if at some point during each remaining day of our lives we deeply touch the experience of anxiety, of fear, of shame, of sadness, of grief, and of the ever-present potential of a totally broken-open heart? The deeply connected relationship and the intimacy that we long for demands everything, is unbearably unsafe and uncertain, utterly groundless, and has nothing to offer to the one who is not ready to lose everything. As Rumi shares, “A thousand half-loves must be forsaken to take one whole heart home.” How deeply can we meet?

We seek love because we believe it has something to offer us. And of course, from a certain perspective, it does. But what it offers is not what we think. It offers a grace-doorway into nothing less than the end of our world. It offers the final invitation to no longer stand back from our lives, protected from our spiritual beliefs and concepts, totally exposed and utterly naked in the arms of the beloved. As we go spinning out of control, with our heart breaking into millions of pieces, we wonder how we’ll ever be put back together again. Just at the point where everything is about to fall apart with no hope of return, where there is only a one-way ticket to devastation, then, just then, we hear a sweet whisper in our ear, and it says, “Friend, stay close, enter here, lose everything.” And then, in a moment totally out of time, we behold the grace which is dripping down out of the stars, that sweetest of love-nectar that somehow keeps the planets from falling out of the sky, flooding this human life with gifts beyond this world.